Otis Twelve | How Did I Get Here?

Greatness

November 10, 2017 · Posted In: Lifestyle, Omaha Magazine

It’s not a “Best Of” category that we consider, but we should. There’s a guy who works on the Yard Waste Truck that services my neighborhood, who I noticed one day, who should be considered […]

Otis Twelve | How Did I Get Here?

If

August 23, 2017 · Posted In: Humor, Omaha Magazine

“What if” questions seem to be a big thing on social media these days. Like…“What if you were dying and could listen to one more song before the end—what song would it be?”  It’s not […]

Eat ’Em If Ya Got ’Em

July 21, 2017 · Posted In: Entertainment, Humor, Omaha Magazine

To quote Monsanto’s 1970s propaganda: “Without chemicals, life itself is impossible.” The multinational agrochemical/biotech corporation is ostensibly in the business of helping farmers grow food. So, let’s just say, “Without food, human existence goes kaput.” […]

Otis Twelve | How Did I Get Here?

If I Were King

April 27, 2017 · Posted In: Entertainment, Humor, Omaha Magazine

I have difficulty falling asleep because I obsess about one thing or another that happened during the day—like the lobby door at the dentist’s office that lacks a “push/pull” label, or the person ahead of […]

Otis Twelve | How Did I Get Here?

Drunk on a Truth Binge

April 18, 2017 · Posted In: Humor, Omaha Magazine

What does a medieval murder have to do with your television viewing habits? How could a bit of historical treachery lead to a description of your propensity for watching endless hours of Netflix, abandoning family […]

Otis Twelve | How Did I Get Here?

The Best Is Yet to Come

April 5, 2017 · Posted In: Business, Omaha Magazine

Wow! A city of “Bests!” Omaha is filled with so many amazing businesses, innovators, artists, entrepreneurs, vendors, doctors, venues, restaurants, and… well you name the category. The “Bests.” They make us proud to be from […]

Otis Twelve | How Did I Get Here?

One For the Books

January 11, 2017 · Posted In: Entertainment, Humor, Omaha Magazine, Publications

Well, another year has come and gone. That is to say: last year has gone, and this new one has come. That is, to be more precise, assuming you are reading this essay sometime after […]

Looks Like We Got Us A Failure

October 3, 2016 · Posted In: Entertainment, Humor, Omaha Magazine, Publications

We all know the old quote. “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” This kind of persistence is considered a virtue, especially when one is engaged in a noble pursuit like trying to […]

A Hole Truth

August 26, 2016 · Posted In: Entertainment, Humor, Omaha Magazine, Publications

There are two things everybody has…” Those are the wise words of my grandfather, Johannes, who hated Kaiser Bill, loved bacon ends, and worked the hard soil of northern Iowa for most of his life. […]

The Revenge of the Lawn

July 20, 2016 · Posted In: Entertainment, Humor, Omaha Magazine, Publications

Being a suburbanite—a classification that gnaws at the very fabric of my bohemian soul—I find myself more and more obsessed with the vegetation that surrounds my mid-century modern home. It is as if there is […]